I used to view marriage as the greatest thing ever and an end to my loneliness. Now I know God is the only one that makes us fully whole!
Living Whole: This is Living Part 4
Diana Marie Arnold
Marriage Doesn’t Equal Wholeness
I used to view marriage as the greatest thing ever; an end to my loneliness. I wanted it so badly and I thought it would fill every empty, hurt spot and exchange it for security and happiness. When I came to understand the Gospel, I began to see marriage through a totally different lens. Jesus took something that I idolized and put it in its rightful place. Marriage is one of the most incredible gifts, but instead of it being a means for satisfying a void and living happily ever after, it became an outpouring of the love that already has made me whole, it became about Gospel Re-Enactment.
Our wedding day was overwhelming, but it wasn’t just because I had finally found my prince charming (thank you, Jesus!!). In the two months of planning for our wedding, my emotions were overwhelmed with how marriage reflects the beauty of the Gospel, it’s a way for us to mirror the relationship between Jesus and His church. As Tim Keller would say, marriage is truly Gospel re-enactment.
In all honesty, I wasn’t as overwhelmed with the flowers and romanticism of the day, I was mostly overwhelmed with emotion at the opportunity for Jesus to make His name known through our wedding day. Our goal for our wedding day wasn’t to put our relationship on display, but rather, we wanted our day to point to Him and all that He’s done for us. We want our marriage to reflect the relationship between Jesus and His Church.
When I took that long-awaited walk down the aisle to my sweet, loving, steadfast husband, my heart just about beat out of my chest. Jesus showed me that this beautiful walk was not only gorgeous in and of itself but made even more beautiful by the fact that this walk was a preview of the ultimate walk that I will one day take into my Savior’s loving arms.
The song “Priceless” was playing as I walked down the aisle.
“I see you dressed in white, every wrong made right, I see a rose in bloom, at the sight of you. Irreplaceable. Unmistakeable. Incomparable. Darling, it’s beautiful. I see it all in you, oh, so priceless.”
So there I was, literally dressed in white. Walking to a man who chooses to love me, who sees me as priceless. Mirroring the greatest love story ever told – the Gospel. In Jesus, we are clothed in white and presented blameless before God. He did that by dying on a cross so that we could be made whole. There was nothing that could stop Him from pursuing us because He sees us as nothing short of priceless.
When I saw myself as whole in Christ, I no longer idolized marriage. I truly could say that God was enough for me, even IF I never got to experience being a bride or being someone’s wife. Jesus filled all of those empty spots that I was hoping a husband would one day fill. Without Jesus, our marriage wouldn’t be half as joyful, secure, kind, + fun as it is. Because we can love one another without expecting anything in return. My sweet husband (although I can’t even find words to express how much I love him) isn’t the source of my happiness, Jesus is.
Girl, I’m sharing this story with you because so many of us girls (myself once included) have this feeling in our souls that we will finally be whole when we are married. This is a total lie, it couldn’t be further from the truth.
Is God Enough?
I believe the question “is God enough?” comes to mind from this story. Take a moment and ask yourself that question. I know, it might be uncomfortable. Your real answer might not be what you wanted to come out. But it’s ok. I think the honest answer is what is going to set the foundation for your breakthrough.
Like I said earlier, marriage is truly a means of Gospel Re-Enactment. Something that we all are already doing as believers. When we put our faith in Jesus, we essentially become His bride. We are called to make Him the King of our lives, and to submit to His perfect will in obedience. Knowing that our freedom and joy come from being one of His sheep. Marriage reflects that because of what we read in Ephesians 5:23, “For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which He is the Savior.”
Jesus has already made you whole, He has already saved you and claimed you as His bride. So even though marriage is a beautiful gift, it in no way makes us whole. Jesus does.
Living Whole
When you place your faith in Jesus, you become His bride: He dresses you in white. He makes all of your wrongs right. He sees you as perfect, without flaw. He is irrevocably in love with you. You can’t do anything to separate yourself from Him. He is in awe of you, your beauty, your smile, the glimmer in your eyes. He loves you so much that He even collects all of your tears. And each moment of your life, you’re essentially walking down the aisle, closer and closer, to meet your sweet Savior at the end. To be picked up, twirled around, and kissed on the forehead. To be told, “well done, my good and faithful servant.” This is how it feels to be made whole, this is love without conditions, this is what you’re worth to Me, this is the real thing. This is living.
This Is Living Series
This four-part series is titled “This Is Living” because when we release the things of this world that we are trying to find fulfillment in and decide to place our lives into the hands of the Father, then we can truly come to life. We once were lost and now we’re found. Life becomes so much more about Him than it is about us. When we come alive in Him we can truly say, this is living.
Other posts in this series:
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