God is meant to be in the center of our relationships, not just a part that we add in. So how do other women walk out their faith in relationships?

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Now Walk It Out In A Relationship

Courtney Holland

How do I walk out my faith in my relationship?

I’m not sure I’ve figured this out yet fully, but I’m learning every day. For any relationship to succeed, I believe, you must be willing to accept the fact that God’s grace is consistent and available, that beautiful relationships take time and WORK, and that the purpose is not about the perfect outcome you may desire.

I married my husband this summer and it’s the best decision I’ve ever made. He is the best decision I will continue to make, the man I will continue to choose for the rest of my days. When I think about our relationship at its best, five ideas and actions come to mind:

1. Continual choice.
2. Grace and more grace.
3. Communication through humility.
4. Willingness to shift perspective.
5. Believing for a greater picture – walking forward with an eternal mindset.

So how do these things tie into our faith and how we walk out our faith in a relationship?

Side note: while this post is geared towards romantic relationships, much of what we discuss here I have also lived out in friendships with my closest girlfriends.

But back to it – when I think about the question, “how do I walk out my faith in my relationship?” I first have to break down what faith is to me.

I think of faith as a combination of confidence, trust, childlikeness, and hope.

Now, you may have a different perspective, but for me, to live out my faith I need to be going back to each of these things and acting out of them. The five actions and ideas I mentioned above seem to be next to impossible without the four characteristics I’ve just listed.

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Confidence

The LORD has called me to be confident. He has given me a spirit of strength, He has spoken identity over me. The ball is now in my court. Am I willing to walk in that with confidence? Am I responding to the identity He has given me? Am I confident that I am capable of hard things, of change, and acting out of that truth?

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Trusting

If I act out of a place of hesitation, distrust, or skepticism then I am going against a large portion of my vows to my husband. When you vow your life to another, you’re using your words to express that you think and trust that that person is going to take care of you, that you can take care of them, and that you are able to weather whatever comes together.

But let’s also look at this before marriage. Before I married Harrison, I trusted that he was a good guy, with honest intentions, and who had my best interest at heart. When arguments or hard moments arose and continue to arise, the first thing we tend to do is get defensive. The opposite of this is openness. In order for me to be open and understanding, rather than defensive, I have to trust that Harrison has my best interest at heart, that we’re ultimately always on the same team, and that we can weather whatever comes.

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Childlikeness

This is a big one for me. I’m stubborn. So, when I think of childlikeness I think of innocence and the desire to learn and grow. The ability to admit fault and be humbled. I think of a child as someone who can be molded and is teachable. This is a crucial aspect for me in all relationships, with Harrison, with friends, and with the Lord.

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Hope

My faith is rooted in the hope of a Savior who loves me and has sacrificed His life for me. I have a hope that is real, a hope for reconciliation, a hope for miraculous moments, and a hope for so much more. I think one of the easiest pitfalls in relationships is when we lose hope for what’s ahead of us.

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For me to walk out my faith in my relationship I must have hope for greater things, and that what lies ahead is far greater than anything I can imagine.

How I walk out my faith in my relationship with my husband starts with how I walk out my relationship with the Lord. If I’m not in a good place with God, it is next to impossible to be in a good place with my husband.

With these characteristics – hope, childlikeness, a trusting heart, and confidence, I find I am able to believe in the greater picture. I am able to set my own thoughts aside and shift perspective. I am able to communicate with humility and grace.

I remember that marriage is a lifelong choice that I will continue to make because of the blessing that it is and the beauty that it holds.

Today, as I sit here and write this, we have been married for two months. That is a microscopic amount of time in the grand scheme of things. Realizing this, I recognize that if I can learn so much in such a short amount of time then there must be loads more to learn down the road.

My greatest hope is to remain hopeful, childlike, trusting, and confident in who the Lord has created me to be. That is how I desire to walk out my faith in my relationship.

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Now Walk It Out

• Confidence– Lean into the identity and spirit of confidence that the Lord has given you. Bring that into your relationship.
• Trust– In the words that they say and promises they make. Trust that the other person has your best interest at heart.
• Childlikeness– Choose to allow yourself to learn and grow and be molded by the experiences in your relationship and by the other person.
• Hope– Have hope for the future. Have a hope that is real, a hope for reconciliation, a hope for miraculous moments.

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Now Pray It Out

Father,

Thank you for giving us the blessing of relationships. Thank you for giving us the gift of marriage and the ability to love and care for each other. I pray that we put you in the center of all of our relationships – both romantic and not. I pray that we approach communication with grace, understanding, and trust. Thank you for continually investing in the relationship you have with us as your children. I pray that we can emulate how you interact with us as much as we can in the relationships that we have in our lives. You are a good good Father, and a good model for how we should love others and how we deserve to be loved.

Your Daughter